Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
