honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
