The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
