Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
We got so high we made milksteak
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
You are a booty call, not a friend.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
