Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
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Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
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then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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