with your own penis?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize