And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
