yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
im holly from the hills drunk
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
