It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
