Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
