it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
