We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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