you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
