Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
