I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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