im drinking this country out of the recession.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
We talked him into tasing himself.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
