i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
