it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
The air was thick with penises
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
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