He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize
