You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I think people are normalizing furries
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
