you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
