Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
