have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.