A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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