noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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