The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Randomize
