the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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