Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
