everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
