Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Randomize
