I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize