apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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