Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize