But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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