I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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