the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
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