Plan B is the new Plan A
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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