Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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