My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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