And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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