I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
