I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Randomize
