Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
