Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
