did you get engaged???
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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