the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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