They should really pass out barf bags in church
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
