Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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