omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize