i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i just had sex bonerless
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
