I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
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He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
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Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.