Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.